Umbra

For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.  2 Timothy 4:3-4

Desire to know and understand needs no apology
big eyes look to mystic things and itching ears keep searching
by reading stars with charts and codes and numerology
potent snakes await by night to snare the one whose lurching.

Disguised as blazing angels, they will keep you seeing red
hypnotizing venom sucks the life out of tomorrow,
eclipsed by outer darkness valid questions go unsaid.

Ambushed soul becomes entrenched in discontent and sorrow
so deep into deception now the serpent makes your bed
who are you but one poor soul now hidden in the shadow?

The search for Truth will satisfy your curiosity
peace and grace for restless minds; the dragon He will trample,
abide in God, be strong in Christ, the devil he must flee,
step among the Light of Hope whose Love is always ample.

Poetry Type: Sonnet (Written as a “Stress Checkerboard Sonnet” – invented by Luke Prater )

I was inspired to try my hand at this very difficult poetic form by prolific poet –  Beth Winter

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12 Comments

Filed under Grace, Jesus, Love, Occult, Poetry

12 responses to “Umbra

  1. I can’t remember the exact quote, but it is something like “even a dying ember can illuminate the darkest night”. That is the image of our Lord that this poem reveals to me. The light of Jesus shines in Satan’s darkest umbra. Jesus will always lead us out of the darkness if we chose to walk in His light.

    Thank you for another blessing in words, Scotti.

    David.

    • That is the perfect quote for the essence of this poem, David. Thanks for sharing. God’s grace can find us and redeem us from the darkest of places.

      I was thinking of one person in particular when I wrote this poem who has no idea they are walking in such a dangerous darkness. In their quest for information they are seeking divination. They are obviously quite spiritual and quite hungry for spiritual awakening. The most I can do is pray for the LORD to reach them in the shadows.

      Your comments here are always very encouraging to me.
      God Bless & Happy New year,
      Scotti

  2. Nice to see another poet trying this form – you’ve written the sonnet version though, not the “Stress Matrix Dectet/Stress Checkerboard Stanza” – 14 lines of alternating iambic heptameter and trochaic heptameter. ie a Stress Matrix Sonnet (or Stress Checkerboard Sonnet). It bears no relation to an Italian Sonnet. This is quite a feat – to my knowledge there is no more difficult form out there, technically speaking. Alternating iambs and trochees is just the beginning. Kudos… I can tell you now that just seven poets before you have managed to write the sonnet version (the Dectet/Stanza is only ten lines and in iambic/trochaic pentameter). If you compare that to the much easier first form I invented, the Octain Refrain, there have been somewhere in the region of 250 written and they continue to be regularly on the blogs, Facebook, etc etc. You can find details of that one on Beth’s site or mine also. Thanks again and well done. Oh – line 12 is iambic, it should be trochaic; also ‘fires’, although it sounds like two syllables, is just one. It’s a diphthong word – the vowel sound changes as we speak it, but technically it’s still just one vowel syllable (like ‘beer’). As it stands it looks like this –

    then YOU | will SEE | com PARED | to CHRIST | all O | ther FIRES | DIM,

    merely as a suggestion, you could easily remedy this line doing something like this –

    YOU will | SEE, com | PARED to | CHRIST, all | O ther | LIGHT re | MAINS DIM,

    (‘DIM’ feels stressed, but it gives you a double-stressed foot to end that line (spondee), which are fairly often used purposefully for emphasis. I think this is a worthy place for one, esp. as it’s the key end-rhyme with your (also arguably spondaic) closure ‘Him’ (über-important word/syllable to this Narrative). )

    er… that was long comment. I’m so used to critique and critiquing that it just splurged out. The crit is just suggestion, feel free to ignore 🙂

    Best

    Luke

    • morningstarpoetry

      Hello Luke,

      I am quite flattered that the inventor of such a complex poetic form would care to visit, comment and critique my sophomoric efforts. Thank you! My entire blog is about experimenting with different poetry forms as I love the challenge and the mind exercise! I am not a formal student of poetry so I cherish the opportunity to learn wherever possible.

      This post has already been updated to reflect the correct poetic form per your feedback (Stress Checkboard Sonnet, right?). I have taken to heart your comments about line 12 and will see what I can come up with to modify the line. I did go back and forth on the word ”fire” questioning as to whether it was considered one syllable or two. I did originally have the word “light” in its place but needed to add another syllable. I went over and over each line testing for the stress of the syllables and often found myself lost and confused! Haha :0 Next time I will write out each line as you did above with the stressed syllable capitalized. That helps a great deal to keep those stressed syllables in line.

      Looking forward to trying the Octain Refrain and anxious to see what other new forms you invent!

      God Bless and Happy New Year,
      Scotti

      • Cheers… on the ‘fires’ diphthong, you could get away with using it as two syllables… let’s face it, we’re writing both in modern English, and also a lot of the time in idiom/dialect (esp regarding pronunciation, which for instance officially differs for many words between British and American English). The majority of poets I know would pronounce ‘fires’ as two syllables even if they strictly make it one when writing in syllabic-sensitive forms. There’s no rule really to say that you can’t use ‘fires’ as two syllables there. It’s a grey area and the poet decides, I always think. We can get too pedantic. I know some English speakers, here in Britain, that do literally pronounce it as one syllable (something like ‘faaa’), but a minority.

      • morningstarpoetry

        Down here in Texas, it is most often pronounced with two syllables!:)

      • morningstarpoetry

        I have had some time to come back and take a look at this poem. I ended up changing the last stanza to be more in line with the poetic form.

  3. As you can see, as soon as I learned of your sonnet, I called it to Luke’s attention. As the inventor, his critique is by far more comprehensive than anything that I could add in regards to structure.

    You have tackled and succeeded in creating poetry in the most difficult form that exists, in my opinion, and I have written more than 60 forms. That you discovered this form through my work and made it your personal challenge from my poetry is a great honor for me.

    Congratulations. If I said that I am impressed, I would be understating my thoughts and feelings.

    • morningstarpoetry

      I appreciate your feedback, Beth! I am thrilled to have found your poetry blog through dVerse. I enjoy your poetry immensely and will be back to visit soon.

  4. Thank you for deciding to tag along with My Hmmm Collection. Never being a fan of poetry, I am surprised to enjoy your originals; their music rings with Truth.

    Keep the Faith!

  5. Thank you! Bless God for the “Truth”. It’s still good to see your still blogging. Nothing since January though?

  6. “The search for Truth will satisfy your curiosity
    peace and grace for restless minds; the dragon He will trample,
    abide in God, be strong in Christ, the devil he must flee,
    step among the Light of Hope whose Love is always ample.”

    Love it

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